I’m good! Thank you for asking.
I cannot help but wonder where your life is headed. And it’s funny ’cause I think I’ve been asking the same question from when you were nothing but an unsuspecting, incurious little kid, for 13 years now I think: “What do you want to become in life?”
You are a misfit. We’ve certainly established that much. You belong in the far past generations, when everything was waaaaaay slower. Life, technology, music, love.. everything. But let’s stop weeping over that now. And let’s not forget you have certainly come a long way from when you first starting thinking about it.
Face it – Right now there is an emptiness in you. You are quiet most of the time. You are emotionally drained/suppressed. Your consistency is always flickering. You quickly lose interest in almost anything. In some sense, you feel all your contemporaries are moving ahead of you. Right now, you’re not in control of your life; your life controls you. Nobody thinks about you. Who are you? What use are you of at all, to anybody today?
But I guess there’s other people feeling the same way, and still doing well for themselves in life. Maybe you just gotta wait until it strikes you, and then everything will be just the way it is supposed to be.
And I guess we’ll find out. Like all else, time will tell your story. People will witness and scrutinize and judge and label your story because the fact remains that even though you have complete ownership of yourself, the idea of you belongs to everyone else watching.
*Poof* Nobody thinks about you. It’s all in your mind. Sonder and all that.
Nobody really bothers about whether your or not your life was a success or whether or not you are remembered, not really. The world (sadly) is a clusterfuck of events put together for no apparent reason. This is no place for meaning.
To future Zakir: You gotta do what you gotta do. Also no matter which career path you choose, what life choices you make and which ties you choose to break; keep in mind those two of your two friends. Treat them well and they will treat you well.